Eureka!..but the hangover prevails.

It was very sad coming out of college on the last day. It was a brilliant four years at BMSCE. Being a "Bull" is once in a life time opportunity. The things you get to do being a bull, is simply fantabulous. I have experienced it and brilliantly lived through it. Anyway the only thing i should say i missed out being a "bull" is to utilize the immense opportunity to roam around with a beautiful "lady bull". If you are a little concerned right now, let me clear it out. We are all "bulls" at BMS, irrespective of the gender. Apart from this it was one brilliant ride all through; rarely bumpy. Freshness was lingering around all the time, with the campus being totally green.

It is not just greenery; it is all about colours, un-imaginable combination of colours. If i have to look back and analyze why we speak only about colours and its beauty, but less of engineering, i would not look any further after i realize that it is very natural for us bulls to turn any damn conversation towards the romanticism in the atmosphere that the college offered. It is just amazing, simply amazing.

This addiction to beautification of life was not at all helping coming out of college. It was too damn hard to face the reality; as people say, surviving through the first job. After a stint of happiness, now starts the interesting boredom in the whole write-up. I suggest you don't read through it if you are momentarily happy. I suggest you dont read it, if you have made a decision on certain things and dont want to think twice on it. I suggest you dont read it if you love your ride.

OK, if you still want to go through it, consider me as your biggest fan. Also I am quite certain that you will not be dead disappointed after your quick browse through this patch. Let me neither pholosophically phrase the whole deal nor fact it out. At the end i am sure that you would either appreciate the situation i am in or scrap the whole shit i have written.

The first day at my first job was neither auspicious nor exciting. I had never planned my career. I had never even thought that i would want to land up in an industry which I am currently associated to. It was a decision made out of the available options, to be very honest. The first month was literally like mourning; just that the black bands were missing. To get used to the situation was my only goal and to gel with the people around was my mission. Off-late I have realized how dangerous it is to get used to situations; anyway, I will come back to this later. Nothing was working out as planned; problem was that there was no real plan as such.  Amidst all this confusion came some brilliant ideas along. It didnt seem like an idea upfront. But as we hooked onto it for some amount of time, it seemed like an idea and it was brilliant. The potential of which came to light with time and effort. I am sure you are pretty confused right now.

Let me take it one at a time. The job was haunting and some part of it is still continuing. Managers seemingly fine-tuning the grace in the shape their moustache took, was quite discomforting. In small and flat organizations, the complete responsibility, from start to end will be on a single person. I was very much aware of this fact before I decided to take up the responsibility of business development for a German hydraulics company. The sole reasoning for my decision was that the organization was small, which would open up a plethora of opportunities and avenues for later. To be quite honest it lived up to my expectations. But the problems began when it started to offer more than what was expected. The politics within the organization, manager moving out, more responsibilitites, handling people alone, getting things done; with just 4-5 months into the first job was quite a humongous task.The confidence of having studied Industrial Engineering and Management (IEM) for 4 good years provided immense confidence. I am being very honest here. The background support of the IEM concepts and theories really helped me to quickly ascertain the situation and act accordingly. Be it the process within the organization or be it handling people at various levels.

But as time passed, I started to get doubts on my decision of joining the company. The work load was too much to handle. But I managed to physically and more importantly, mentally survive through it; rather far better than just a bare survival. Riding 32 kilometers everyday to go face the music, which was not so pleasant was really de-motivating. Biking was never a good experience to me. Riding through the dusty nayandahalli junction, twice, was a real pain. After riding the bike for more than 8000 kilometers now, I have a permanent back pain. Riding a Yamaha did not turn out to be an exciting affair. The problem with me was, I was so much accustomed to the BMS way of life; it was really damn hard to get adjusted to the professional life. This indecisive, dilemmatic life lead to a disturbance which was pushing me to help myself understand what is it that I love doing. I belive in two philosophies. One - at the end of the day, when you have your head placed on the sack, you should be satisfied about how things went, the whole day. Two - Sleeping on your death bed, if you look back, you cannot afford to think about a risk that you did not take. Currently, I am not following the first one and partly living up to the second.

Anyway amidst this disturbance, breezed across an idea; the idea which is still hazy and covered with mist. The brilliance of my friend kumara and an initiative of us both to build a team to help the orphanage kids out during their cultural programme. We decided to carry our theatre exposure from college forwad and make some sense out of the experience gained. That was when "KALEIDO" took birth, I should say this was the best thing, so far, to be happening in my life. We have now completed three short movies, two stage directions and a street play is in progress. It is not about the numbers. It is about how we are growing as a team, it is about our skill and capability in store and it is about the amount of opportunities available for service outside. We are a team of nearly 20 people now. The potential of the team is yet to be measured for Kaleido's further decisions and actions.

If i take myself to the air and have a bird's eye view of the events that have happened over the course of one year, it is not all that bad. All the tension and drama unfolding at my workplace has really given a meaning to my thinking. It has definetely made its influence for good. The decision that I myself forced to take out of the available options is luckily proving to be very useful. The momentary discomfort is really required; it adds different dimensions to the whole thought process. You will eventually start analyzing well. The only reason I started to go out of the way to do things that normally I dont beleive myself in doing it, is because I really was not able to get used to the situation I was in. I am now damn confident in whatever I am doing. More importantly, I do what I love to do now.

One year of topsy-turvy ride seems to have stabilized now. Looks like brilliant times ahead. All that is negative and antagonistic will follow. But I have realized that it is all for our learning and betterment. Looking forward for better challenges and equally eager to risk it out.