Trust the dots will connect right..

The stages in life as people say; is it only visible for a third party or can we ourselves experience crossing over? I cannot really generalize my opinion. But what I can do is to share what I am going through now on this. Well, lost in details all this while, I have surely failed to recognize the various transitions I had right from my school to college and then to a job. Having an easy life all through last 25 years, thanks to my parents and my brother for they have looked after me so well, I had to bring upon trouble myself to experience the dark side of life. Such be the ambience of my growth certain things were taken for granted. The sad part is I never realized then, but there is hope. I can see a silver lining now; I have realized that it is better late than never.

I am loved crazily by people around. Now I feel I can have my own way and that I am understood in the right sense. You see I had taken this for granted. Lesser did I know that compromise on the other side was a perennial undercurrent. I was not able to feel it. Sailing smooth on the mainstream, the current beneath takes you places as long as you are not opposing the flow. The comparison here is different. I am not intending to follow the current either. But all I am trying to tell is that someone else’s compromise is driving me ahead. I guess this is how it will be with every individual. Not that I am a self-obsessed dominant male who is entitled for acceptance while others compromise for my sake. It is just that I failed to recognize the compromises.

I was recently discussing this with a very good friend of mine and I just realized as I shared it with her this fact. There has been lot of lessons that I have learnt. I was an integral part of this community of youngsters who behave a rebel inside for everything the parents tell, but follow such ethics in total contradiction outside. It is not for long will you stay blind to such behavior. The fallacy reaches its peak quickly. And the loser would be the one deciding to remain ignorant about it. Some bold step is required from within. A change will take effect that will ensure you are no more lethargic. You will eventually feel proud about it. And this is the point where you see yourself transiting into the next stage.

The symptoms are pretty straight. You will inevitably be more mature. You feel the composure that has developed within. All this is good, but you start missing being playful like you were before all the time. With the thinking cap on, you realize your age. Every second from here on becomes extremely important. I know I have put in quite an effort during my working hours to type in all this and have lost quite a few minutes. But the gain on the other side, only I can enjoy going forward. Well, it surely makes my thought process light; I am positive. I had followed this statement, ‘When you know that you do not know, you begin to know yourself’ said by Socrates since long but had never really understood as I do now.

No, I am not intending to clarify my position at the line; the journey has already begun and I am far beyond the starting point. So no turning back now. Things have changed in my life, rather the way I look at things around have changed. As remarked earlier the maturity is at a better level. The compromises beneath on the other side are quite clearly visible and sailing over it, I feel accountable. I have enjoyed spending money. Well, I don’t have to smoke or rock the chair with a Heineken Beer in hand to party and enjoy life. Money was neither a fascination nor a requirement to me personally. But some experiences in life in staggered phases taught me and kept on reminding me of its importance. I had decided to make a career in the non-profit sector trying to help people based on the goodwill and generous charity flowing in. Sooner did I realize how important sustainability of growth is more than the growth itself. Another realization here. This was something very interesting. The way I looked at life totally changed.

Looking at development, I was very sympathetic about the problem at hand. I was pushed to question my way of life. I was pushed to question the imbalance in opportunities. I was pushed to question the purpose of my existence. Fuelled by my visits to the orphanages, rural schools and tribal settlements inside the forests, the exposure was increasing. It gave me lot of ideas. Ideas were flowing in through discussions as well. Meeting and knowing people is exciting. Being a part of them and working towards our own prosperity gives me a kick. But one major thing I realized as I started pooling in help and resources, that this model is not going to stay for long unless the system is sustainable; generating its own revenue. This was when I leaned back to the idea of profits. The challenges and limitations made me believe in the idea of profits. I am into sales developing businesses for a company last three years. My pockets are filled only after I sell hydraulics, Profit did make sense to me. The shift in thought process was not so difficult.

With this shift in the outlook towards life, I decided to go behind what I think I want in life. The change now I could clearly witness was that I believed in what I think was good for me. When I could do that for myself, I realized how simple it was for me to believe in my own capabilities, yet so difficult. This statement from Ratan Tata, ‘ You can never take a right decision. You take a decision and make it right’ I had heard a few months back. The aftereffects of this was so strong and the timing was so accurate that I could just not allow it to pass over my head. For the part where you make it right, you need to believe in yourself. And when I could see the confidence in me that I could make a decision I took, right, was when I realized a change in my approach. Looking back, the dots are seeming to connect; shape unknown. I am nowhere speaking about results. I have not seen it yet. It is not there still. It is just that the journey is turning out to be extremely beautiful.